Day 5 - Social Media Ignorance! :)

I can't believe how much I've actually fitted into the last few days. Between work and the boys, we've had a pretty jam packed timetable, and I really don't know how I've managed to include social media into my life and kept going…. so some positives about social media not being in my life.

1. Low-carb, paleo-esque diet is keeping me awake, happy and less moody, which I guess equals more energy. Generally have eggs and either veggies or bacon for breakfast, either yoghurt with fruit, cold meat and salad or a protein shake for lunch, and dinner is meat (chicken, pork, salmon, meatballs, steak, etc) with steamed, roasted or stir-fried veggies. I've been snacking on almonds and shredded coconut. Drinking lots of lemon-infused water and peppermint tea. My naughty indulgences have been a handful of jelly lollies, two bites of white chocolate, a tablespoon of mashed potato, a glass of wine and some butterscotch self-saucing pudding. I guess it's not too bad for 4 days. I have lost 1.1 kilos, so I guess that's a good start.

2. Morning walks to the beach and up and down the 108 steps a couple of times. That really is my only exercise.

3. Getting more work done during the day so I can sleep better at night, not worrying that I still have to work in the morning. That really all depends on when my last appointments are in the day… The later the appointment, the harder it is to get it done before the onslaught of family time invades the evening.

4. Time to read a book.

5. Time to have more laughs with my boys, as well as help them with their homework.

6. I've organised a couple of coffee catch ups with old friends.

7. Being ignorant to what everyone thinks, does and posts.

8. Not thinking about what I'm missing out on!

Negatives about not having social media in my life:

1. Saying Happy Birthday to friends who I don't have contact with outside of Facebook.

2. Getting messages through Facebook that pop up on my phone that I really want to answer (ok, ok… I did once, hence one of the coffee dates.) (I have moved Facebook and Messenger to the back lists on my phone rather than deleting them… more out of sight, out of mind).

Life is good… and can only get better, by staying positive and being in-tune with what your body, mind and spirit need.

Positive Friends

There are three outstanding people in my adult life, who, no matter what, see the positives in whatever is presented to them.

One of my friends lost her mum last week.... she'd been the primary carer for her for the past 4.5 years, and she sees herself as being so lucky that she had a beautiful mum, a loving relationship with her and that her mum was such an inspiration to others. She is a single mum who just so happened to have lost her boyfriend the day her mum died for his own reasons, but she did whatever she could do to put her energies into finalising her mum's life. Her 14 year old son, is in an accelerated program at school, and on the same day as her mother's funeral, she attended his award's ceremony, where he received an award for the most outstanding academic achievement for his year level. He beat the odds where he is self-motivated, dedicated to his studies, but still has time to be a kid - he skate boards everywhere, has a great group of friends, plays video games, even makes his mum a cup of tea because she thinks she needs one... an unbelievable kid, who's parents split five years ago, and somehow manages his life between both homes.

Another friend, was married in her late 30s and had her one and only child in her early forties. She laughs at the fact that her husband wants his big boy toys when all she's bought him for Christmas is a pair of board shorts and a packet of socks. She laughs when her husband buys her a birthday present, like a kayak or wetsuit that just happens to fit him, not her. She doesn't mind if things don't go to plan... she's very cruisy, always thinking of others and is constantly smiling.

Then my dearest friend, has had a few years of the most unfortunate events in her life that just seem to be continuing. For most, they would have committed suicide, broken a law, done something to change the direction of life because the life she lives is just so unforgiving, but she keeps going on. Her latest crisis is more personal and somehow she sees it as being a relief than a heartache. It's a relief because at least she wasn't feeling like her mind was going insane and something really 'is' happening. No matter what, she just keeps soldiering on.

But there is also a friend of a friend, who's been diagnosed with a rare form of cancer a little less than 2 years ago. She's had operation after operation and somehow remains positive, doing motivational talks, telling people how wonderful her life is due to the support of family and friends. She's doing everything she possibly can to fulfil her life, including getting married last month. But she knows her end is near, and even had a 'goodbye' party last weekend. She truly is an inspiration to so many.

So for all those who feel life, especially at this time of year, is getting too much for them, spare a thought for those who are going through so much more... Perspective is huge, and what personal crises we may be going through ourselves, are truly nothing to those who've lost a loved one or going through a personal health crisis... be thankful for what you've got and hug those who mean the most to you. Be in the moment and give so much love, and then you'll feel the energy change and you'll feel good about who you are and what you mean to so many.

Celebrations and commiserations

Yesterday I turned 39 and I said to myself at the start of the day, I wouldn't let anyone get me down. It was my birthday, and if I'm special to those who make the effort, they are the people who mean the most to me. As a single mum, and most single mums will feel this heartache, your birthday is the day that you really want people to recognise you because every other day feels like a thankless grind of unappreciative kids, mundane chores and squeezing in a day's work between trips to the doctors, after school sports and quick stops to the grocery store. And if you don't have that special someone to spoil you, you have to do the spoiling yourself.

I did everything I could to enjoy my day. The boys and I took our bikes and rode to the Village to have breakfast alfresco style watching the train commuters rushing off to work. I indulged in French toast with banana and bacon, with a strawberry/banana smoothie, while the boys had a combination of poached eggs and pancakes between them. After I rode to school with the boys, I went a spoiled myself with a therapeutic massage finishing off with a little bit of retail therapy, which was more of a waste of time, because I just can't stand the 80s colours that line the shop floors. I then had a beautiful lunch with  a girlfriend of tapas and calamari Asian style salad, a couple of glasses of sparkling and two hours of light conversation and laughter before picking up the boys from school and riding home with them. Somehow, after my two glasses of sparkling, I felt like an afternoon kip, and slept for about an hour and a half, before I took the boys out for Mexican watching the sun set over the bay. My day was interwoven with phone calls, text messages and Facebook love, some from a few surprises, others who you'd expect to say something, didn't... But that's OK, because I refuse to focus my energy on those who don't feel I'm deserving, but do to those who believe I am.

My girlfriend who I went to lunch with, had her birthday a month ago, and she loved that her birthday extended into a week of celebrations. I guess my birthday started on Sunday with lunch out with my parents, and I have a friend taking me out to dinner next Wednesday, so it will be an elongated 10 day event. I know people's lives are busy, because you know how busy your life is, and really, that's OK. But it does make you think, have you done something to offend someone this year, or did you not make the effort to be a friend when your friend needed you the most, or have you been a little bit self-absorbed because there has been way too much going on in your life to concern yourself with other's dilemmas and friends have felt your neglect? Who knows... but this is a public apology to all those who I haven't been there at all the times when they needed a friend.

I know my blog has offended people who are close to me in the past because no matter who they are, they all think that I'm writing about them, and in most cases, I'm not, they are general statements. So I've learnt now, not to tell new friends or acquaintances about my blog so I can keep the harmony.

So I thank those from the depths of my hearts who have chosen to celebrate my birthday with me - even if it was just a phone call, a message or a glass of bubbly, it touched me that I mean so much to you for you to remember (or made the effort from seeing that my birthday was posted on Facebook ;) ). I look forward to 39 being a year of positivity, new adventures, beautiful friends, fabulous working relationships, seeing my boys be happy and hopefully a book deal before I'm 40. Not long now, but I'm determined to make it happen! :)