Yesterday I turned 39 and I said to myself at the start of the day, I wouldn't let anyone get me down. It was my birthday, and if I'm special to those who make the effort, they are the people who mean the most to me. As a single mum, and most single mums will feel this heartache, your birthday is the day that you really want people to recognise you because every other day feels like a thankless grind of unappreciative kids, mundane chores and squeezing in a day's work between trips to the doctors, after school sports and quick stops to the grocery store. And if you don't have that special someone to spoil you, you have to do the spoiling yourself.
I did everything I could to enjoy my day. The boys and I took our bikes and rode to the Village to have breakfast alfresco style watching the train commuters rushing off to work. I indulged in French toast with banana and bacon, with a strawberry/banana smoothie, while the boys had a combination of poached eggs and pancakes between them. After I rode to school with the boys, I went a spoiled myself with a therapeutic massage finishing off with a little bit of retail therapy, which was more of a waste of time, because I just can't stand the 80s colours that line the shop floors. I then had a beautiful lunch with a girlfriend of tapas and calamari Asian style salad, a couple of glasses of sparkling and two hours of light conversation and laughter before picking up the boys from school and riding home with them. Somehow, after my two glasses of sparkling, I felt like an afternoon kip, and slept for about an hour and a half, before I took the boys out for Mexican watching the sun set over the bay. My day was interwoven with phone calls, text messages and Facebook love, some from a few surprises, others who you'd expect to say something, didn't... But that's OK, because I refuse to focus my energy on those who don't feel I'm deserving, but do to those who believe I am.
My girlfriend who I went to lunch with, had her birthday a month ago, and she loved that her birthday extended into a week of celebrations. I guess my birthday started on Sunday with lunch out with my parents, and I have a friend taking me out to dinner next Wednesday, so it will be an elongated 10 day event. I know people's lives are busy, because you know how busy your life is, and really, that's OK. But it does make you think, have you done something to offend someone this year, or did you not make the effort to be a friend when your friend needed you the most, or have you been a little bit self-absorbed because there has been way too much going on in your life to concern yourself with other's dilemmas and friends have felt your neglect? Who knows... but this is a public apology to all those who I haven't been there at all the times when they needed a friend.
I know my blog has offended people who are close to me in the past because no matter who they are, they all think that I'm writing about them, and in most cases, I'm not, they are general statements. So I've learnt now, not to tell new friends or acquaintances about my blog so I can keep the harmony.
So I thank those from the depths of my hearts who have chosen to celebrate my birthday with me - even if it was just a phone call, a message or a glass of bubbly, it touched me that I mean so much to you for you to remember (or made the effort from seeing that my birthday was posted on Facebook ;) ). I look forward to 39 being a year of positivity, new adventures, beautiful friends, fabulous working relationships, seeing my boys be happy and hopefully a book deal before I'm 40. Not long now, but I'm determined to make it happen! :)
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