Where's Mine?!

Don't all single mums wish they had a knight in shining armour? Someone who can give them endless streams of money, copious amounts of extravagant gifts and make love to them with passion giving them multiple orgasms that last for hours?

I was reading an article today that Gordon Ramsay is liquidating his Melbourne restaurant 'Maze' at Crown Casino because it wasn't turning a profit. According to Crown Casino where it is located, it had 350,000 customers in the last 12 months turning over millions of dollars, and it can't make a profit? But then it was said that Gordon fired his father-in-law as chief executive officer Chris Hutchenson because he had swindled away millions of dollars to finance a secret second wife and children as well as pay an additional mistress five thousand pounds a month to essentially keep her mouth shut about their affair.

So, here I beg to ask the question, where's mine?!! How nice to have someone look after you financially while you pay them in kind with sexual favours. At what time does the mistress and the second wife, for that matter, get tired of the secrets, the constant awareness of not making a mistake when they want to blurt out his name, or how their man makes his money to friends or family when their are high-profile stakes involved. And then the secrets eat you up, jealousy takes over you and you get tired of the sharing. You don't know what the truth is anymore.

So is the 'hush money' worth it? Who knows? Hush money isn't made of love that's for sure. It's made of bribes, lies and superficiality. But then if the relationship you have with your secret lover doesn't have money involved - no gifts, no expense accounts, not even going 'dutch' for things and you're expected to pay your way because he doesn't want the wife to find out about his clandestine affair, then is there true love involved or are you just being abused in the relationship?

It's a tricky one, because every relationship is different. Someone once told me that if, if you go around to someone's house for dinner and you bring a good bottle of wine for the meal and they decide to shelve it and bring out a cheap bottle to go with their sausages and three veg, then that's how they view your relationship with them, and you will only be treated with subservient style for the remainder of the time you know these people. But if you go to their home, and they crack open the bottle of wine you brought for the meal and match it with a seafood banquet, then you know that they will open their hospitality to you with open arms. But even that's not always true either.

For instance, when I first met my lover, we went to pick up a burger from Carls Jr because we had been nervous all day about meeting each other, and food was the last thing on our mind. But when we returned to his place, he had a bottle of champagne ready to crack to celebrate our union. Things got a little worse, when we ate canned soup to celebrate my birthday, but he coupled it with funky little appetisers that showed that he knew how to dress up a simple meal. The last time we were together, his generosity just shone. He paid for a Junior Suite at the Doubletree for a week and he booked us into the finest restaurants in the town - I rarely had to put my hand in my pocket, it was wonderful, and so appreciated. He was the consummate gentleman. Something that I'd really never experienced because my ex rarely made enough money to keep his head above water.

So maybe my turn has come, who knows... but I don't think it will ever be to the extent that Chris Hutcheson's second wife and mistress have it (or should I say 'had' it). Do I want it? A little piece of me says yes, and a different part of me says no. I do like my financial independence, but it would be nice having a break from it every once and a while ;)